I received the news
That, just miles away,
You had just died
On christmas day.

I froze in my tracks,
Unable to speak.
My mind filled with thoughts
I had never told you.

I made a vow then,
For my next love,
To tell her everything,
When it's thought of.

The next week went by
All in a blur.
My eyes were watered,
My speech was slurred.

It was the perfect sob story,
The one of your death,
With you and your mother
Both with crunched heads.

Your father was traumatized even more than I.
He often got drunk,
But more often high.
He tried to forget
All that he knew,
About your mother,
And especially you.

On the next christmas,
Anniversary of the day,
He used a noose,
To take the pain all away.

Last thing I heard,
Of your sisters news,
One found a home,
And a family too.

The other one,
I'm afraid,
Picked up her things,
And ran away.

Things have been much harder,
Since you left,
I'm all alone,
And have this regret,
Of not telling my parents,
About you and me,
But have often wondered,
how can this be


Hannah Mallar
November 17, 1980-December 25, 2006